Everyone go on Facebook right now and list your best friends.  Just put it right there in the status update. If you want you can number them 1. 2. 3. That’s optional. But selecting a few friends is not. Go ahead.


Ok. You don’t list your best friends anymore…that was so third grade.

But…it wasn’t such a great thing in third grade was it?

How would you feel if your teacher had you list your best friends and post them on your locker? Which is in the common hallway for the entire school to peruse as they line up and wait for the tech center.

What if you were a new kid who had no one to list?

What if you listed three friends and none of them chose you? What if no one in the class chose you at all?

Here is what was on Leo’s locker for the first two months of school:

Looks sweet, right?

Looks sweet, right?

Look a little more closely

Look a little more closely



When I asked Leo about the posters he was unmoved by the possible upset a public friend list could cause. He noticed that he was only on one list, but somehow this didn’t bother him at all. I imagine some of the kids didn’t take it with such ease. I wonder how the little girl felt whose name was crossed off of the number 2 spot on the poster of the only classmate on her best friends list.

At back to school night I cast myself as the difficult parent and told Leo’s homeroom teacher that I wondered if those posters might cause a little unrest amongst the kids socially. She looked at me sweetly. “How so?” She asked.

She must have been popular in elementary school.

She assured me that they would be “coming down soon.”

They made it home this weekend in the Friday folder. My little hoarder did something unusual and transferred his sheet directly from his folder to the recycling. This is unprecedented.

What do you think?
Am I overreacting?

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Anna Rosenblum Palmer is a freelance writer based in Denver, CO. She writes about sex, parenting, cat pee, bi-polar disorder and the NFL; all things inextricably intertwined with her mental health. In her free time she teaches her boys creative swear words, seeks the last missing puzzle piece and thinks deeply about how she is not exercising. Her writing can be found on Babble, Parent.co, Great Moments in Parenting, Ravishly, Good Men Project, Sammiches and Psych Meds, Playpen, Crazy Good Parent, and YourTango. She also does a fair amount of navel gazing on her own blog at annarosenblumpalmer.com.

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